I'm having a bad headache now.
Been lying on my bed for hours and i can't sleep at all.

I have lost you.
A person who i loves a lot.
I did whatever i can.
Loves you whole heartly.
But still....
My heart really hurts a lot.
Imagine how much feelings i have for you.
And i need to forget it all.
All the good memories we had.
Its totally impossible to forget it.
Tears been rolling down every few minutes.
I totally can't control.
This feeling is just so, so bad.

I guess i'll stop blogging for the time being.
I'm lost.
I'll be fine after a few months.


*i have lost you forever.

I have sleepless nights everyday.
You seems to be very far away from me,
I don't know what to do.
My heart hurts when i think of you,
Hoping that you would forget your past and starts our own future.
Trying to talk to you,
And i'm silently waiting for your reply.
When you didn't reply,
My hopes are dashed.
Asking myself why am i doing all this,
And my answer is

I truly loves you.

I can't sleep again. How i wish i wasn't exist.

Things are going over and over in my mind again. I told myself not to rush but i want the truth.

Why are things so complicated? Its freaking me out!

I want to shout it out loud!
I want to cry it out loud!
I need someone to talk to!

I think i'll be the one losing out.

*i don't wanna lose you

Zzz, i can't find my SQL cd..! I need it urgently for my project man..! Don't know where it gone to liao. Call my sister she never pick up. I guess i gotta wait for her to come back and find for me. Because only she know where is the cd.

My eyes is so strained now.

Today almost scolded by Darran. Haha. Because Heng Ling, Darran and me are supposed to meet at 7.30am to do project. But Heng Ling and me overslept. Was supposed to morning call her at 6.30am. The alarm clock did wake me up. But somehow, i picked up my handphone and doze off. Haha.

And around 7.10 then i called her. Knowing that she will be still sleeping. Yes she's still sleeping. So we talk awhile what to do. And she say she will msg darran that she will be late or something. So i say okay and i went to sleep again. I think we had some miscommunications. She thinking that i will be msging Darran too. But hmmm i was in a sleepy mode so i didn't take note what i have said plus i had a mild fever. Then i went to sleep on.

So Darran msg me and called me but i'm still sleeping. Guess he was quite angry. Because he was in school at 7.30am liao. Heng Ling arrived at 9am and i arrived at 11am. Sorry for that buddy.

My body is aching today.

Do ITEC project till 8.30pm before going home. Ate this noodle from stall 2 which cause Heng Ling and me to have tummyache. Wth. I shall never buy food from that stall ever again.

Going to bathe soon. Tata

Just bathed finished.
Waiting for a call now.

While waiting let me update.

I'm just feeling so tired, so pain and so sad.

I don't understand SP so rich liao yet they can't postpone or waive the 1k over of school fees. Forcing people to pay the school fees by cash. If not, you will be forced to quit school. What the hell is this. Study in SP for one and a half year liao then forced to quit school? Might as well don't waste money studying in SP for this one and a half year. I just hope i can find a solution and nothing happens to her.

The call hasn't come yet.
Staring into space.
I'm feeling so sick.

Got back all my results which is tested last week. My results so-so. Here, take a look.

Internet Technologies (ITEC) - 60
Mobile Commerce (MCOM) - 63
Information Systems and Network Security (ISNS) - 64
Etiquette and Professional Image (EPI) - 82
Mobile Communications Technology (MCOT) - 84
Web Applications Development (WEBA) - Coming soon on 24th August
Mobile Internet Programming (MPRG) - Unknown because our results too bad, will be retaking.

Anyway, assignments deadlines are so near.

Here are the deadlines:

Mobile Internet Programming (MPRG) - 1st Part -- 18th August, 2nd Part -- 9th September
Internet Technologies (ITEC) -- 26th August
Mobile Commerce (MCOM) -- 26th August
Web Applications Development (WEBA) -- 2nd September
Information Systems and Network Security (ISNS) -- 12th September

Well, just finished doing some WEBA for Heng Ling. Because her laptop is still in service and i'm very guilty about it. Talking about Acer, its so fcuking slow that its takes 1 week ++ to repair one laptop. Service so bad! Must complain!

I'm very hungry now, can someone please cook me a bowl of noodles? The last packet of milk is being taken by my sister. =.=. Lazy to make milo for myself nor cooking. All the tibits finished liao. Argh, i'm going to starve tonight.

Guess i going off now, tomorrow lesson starts at 9 and i only have 6 hours to sleep now. Tata.

Heard from Mr Ronnie, that MPRG will have a "retest" soon because there's simply too many failures liao. lol. So, i must take this chance to study properly. WEBA paper is around the corner too. This is so stress.

Sometimes i can't stop thinking about everything.

Studies or Love?
Or both?

I'm trapped. What has happened to me?
The past old independent of me has become so weak now.

Tonnes of assignments are coming in now.
I need to clear my mind.
But..
I can't let go of you.

I'm having sleepless nights thinking what to do.
My future is blurry.

Maybe i'll just let time to prove everything.
Patience is virtue.

*Changing playlist to Puddle of Mudd - Blurry

Everything is so blurry, and everyone is so fake
And everybody is empty, and everything is so messed up
Preoccupied without you, I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you, I stumbled and I crawl
You could be my someone you could be my scene
You know that I will protect you from all of the obscene
I wonder what you are doing imagine where you are
There is oceans in between us, and that is not very far

Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
When you shoved it in my face,
This pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
When you shoved it in my face

Everyone is changing, there is no one left that is real
So make up your own ending, and let me know just how you feel
Cause I am lost without you, I cannot live at all
My whole world surrounds you, I stumbled and I crawl
You could be my someone you could be my scene
You know that I will save you from all of the unclean
I wonder what you are doin I wonder where you are
There is oceans in between us but that is not very far

Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
When you shoved it in my face,
This pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
When you shoved it in my face,
This pain you gave to me

Oh nobody told me what you thought,
Nobody told me what to say
Everyone showed you where to turn,
Told you when to run away
Nobody told you where to hide,
Nobody told you what to say
Everyone showed you where to turn,
Showed you when to run away

Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
When you shoved it in my face,
This pain you gave to me
Can you take it all away
Can you take it all away
When you shoved it in my face,
This pain you gave to me

No!
This pain you gave to me

Can you take it all
Take it all away
This pain you gave to me
Take it all away
This pain you gave to me
Take it all away
This pain you gave to me

Last week i talk about Microsoft banned piracy. Here's another story i read on Sunday Times. A hacker saved those people who used pirated Microsoft Windows XP. Hehehe


Microsoft thwarted

MICROSOFT'S fight against software pirates has been dealt a blow with hackers releasing a code that circumvents its anti-piracy program.
The simple Javascript code, available on the Internet, bypasses the new security checks that scan Windows software for a genuine security key before updating the software.
A Microsoft spokesman said the issue was not a security vulnerability that put customers at risk, and that the new security features were not designed to catch counterfeiters or prevent hackers.
Instead, "its intent is to help innocent customers realise the full value of authentic Windows software while protecting investments made by our partners."


Well, till now i still can't find where the hell is the Javascript for bypassing the security checks. -_-. So i don't know if this news is true.

Anyway, next week i gotta be budget liao. If not i would really go bankrupt soon. I want to specially thanks to one of my good friend "dotty"! Hehe.. I guess when you read liao you should know who ba. She's a really nice friend to have. =D. Don't worry, when you need help i won't forget you. Haha.

Going off now. Oh btw, i just changed my specs. Will be getting it next Saturday.


*Changing playlist to Fragma - Time and Time Again

You know we've got a little secret
We hold each other close and keep it
All to ourselves
Your love is my protection
You take my breath away
I long for your affection everyday(x2)

[Chorus]
I feel you
See you
Time and time again
Within my heart
I knew it from the start

I feel you
See you
Time and time again
Within my heart
We're never gonna part

You know that we should be together
I feel you're in my soul I'll never
Ever let you go
Your love is the solution
You take the blues away
You are the one conclusion
Everyday

I feel you
See you
Time and time again
Within my heart
I knew it from the start

I feel you
See you
Time and time again
Within my heart
We're never gonna part

Time and time again within my heart(x2)

I wanna know where you belong
I wanna know why I sing this song
I tried to show how much I feel
Is that a dream or is it real?

I never look where you belong
Until I gotta sing my song
Is it a lie or is it true?
So many tears I've cried for you

[Chorus]
Woh ohh, a million tears for you
Wooho ohh, a million tears for you
Ohh, a million tears for you
Wooho ohh, a million tears for you

A million tears that I have cried
I wish you were right by my side
I tried to show how much I care
Believe in me I will be there

I never knew where you belong
Whenever you just hear my song
Is it a lie or is it true?
So many tears I've cried for you

A bad day has ended with a beautiful fireworks display. Tears nearly roll down my cheeks. It's simply too nice liao. No words to describe. All thanks to alex for his pictures.

Mobile Columns is very nice too. All the army tanks and civil defence. They even fire blank bullets when they are driving pass. It's sort of a battlefield. Its seems very fun to be in army. lol.


3 F-16 flew pass while we are waiting for the fireworks.




Here's the pictures of the fireworks. Simply brilliant.






























That's the conclusion of today's bad day.


*the moment i saw these fireworks, you came across my mind. i simply can't forget you

Things are so fragile. It just happened so suddenly due to some unfore see circumstances. I'm feeling so guilty and bad.

Firstly would like to apologise to heng ling. The lap top just went slienced. I don't know what happened but i guess its my fault because i'm the one using it at that time. I will make it up de.

Secondly i would like to apologise to my poly mates. I might not be able to turn up for the NDP celebrations. Things just happened too suddenly. Hope i can get the things done soon.

This is just not my day.


*i'm so sorry. ='(

The next time if i want reformat my computer, i would have to think twice. Why? Let me tell you.

I saw this latest news from Microsoft in Sunday Times today.


Windows latched

"MICROSOFT has pulled the plug on the sytem that allows users of pirated Windows software to get regular software updates.
The company has set up a new sytem that scans computers requesting updates for pirated versions before allowing any update to take place. "


Dammit. This means i shall not get any latest stuff from Microsoft again till i get an original verison. This sux. Because i'm using a pirated verison. =x I was wondering why Microsoft want to do that. You know one original Windows software cost about $350++. With $350++ i can get a very good graphics card already. Why should i waste money on the software? =x. Anyway i guess this is going to affect many of my friends because their computer is installed with pirated version of mine. lol.

Microsoft has been earning billions every year. I'm wondering why they want to bully us, these poor people to buy original. Aren't their earnings enough? Sigh. This taught us a lesson. Not to support piracy.


*i feel you, see you, time and time again within my heart. i knew it from the start.

time now is 1.14am.. i'm 19 hours without sleep... yet.. i don't know why i don't feel sleepy now..

today which is saturday, woke up at 6.30am.. went to bishan just to found out that i had to go home empty-handed.. i waited there for 1 hour.. call her so long no one picked up.. i'm just pissed off.. then i spent 1 hour to go there and 1 hour to go back home.. i was really so angry at this moment.. i shld have called ckw to come out.. didn't know u already wake up liao.. and so i went home.. wasted 4 hours..

so afternoon went to sim lim square wif wj to buy his router.. saw tqz and his aunt.. they help wj bargain his router price till very low.. haha.. went bugis walked around and played puzzle fighter at the arcade there.. i din managed to complete at the last stage but wj completed liao.. haha.. this is the game we are gd at.. then during evening meet up wif the guys.. got wj, gabby, ckw, wy, rayson, jth, matt, kenny, jy, jack, leo to celebrate james's birthday.. had dinner at cartel.. the food is very nice there and its filling.. i'm so full for the 1st time..

then walked aimlessly around orchard.. shared my problems wif a few of my good buddies.. dammit i saw someone so familiar! omg.. its so alike.. i take a look closer just to found out its not her.. she's working now.. how can she be walking on the streets? i'm just thinking too much.. lots of ppls queuing to go in china black liao.. but still some of us not enuff age to go in.. so went drinking again at cuppage there.. had lots joys and laughter.. but it just cant cheer me up.. how i wish i could drowned my sorrows.. ckw tell me not to... its just too expensive to do it.. lol! cos i got no more money in my wallet liao and he will be the one lending me.. =x anyway thanks alot for the drinks.. lastly bought a cake from swensens for james.. the cake taste very nice..! after that, got home and got scolded for coming home so late at on this month.. sigh...

spent alot today.. self declared bankrupt now... today is a bad day for me.. i'm in a very bad mood..


*i'm not angry with you already but i'm very concerned about you.

surprised surprised.. i PASS MY ITEC! woot! lol.. i thought i will fail liao.. mr yatim is a nice teacher.. lazy to blog liao.. cos i gotta bathe now.. time now is 12.56am.. i'm damm stinky.. btw my new skin.. nice? i need to change the color of the words sia.. damm hard to read now..

finally. mst is over! felt relieved and happy.. but i guess mprg and itec will buang.. lol..

hmmm let me have a brief update for the past few days..



afternoon went to pass isns notes to hl then went to meet ckw for pool.. at nite went to celebrate my mum and sis's birthday at a restuarant at IMM. the food there so so ba.




went to study wif hl at harbour front for the whole day.. i love the chicken cutlet rice there..! but hl say not nice leh.. haha..




1st paper in the morning.. ISNS.. it was okay though.. then second paper ITEC in late afternoon.. damm.. this is hard! i tink my ITEC going to buang.. =(

*i have clear all my doubts. =)




came to sch very early to study wif hl cos darran couldn't make it.. ahem! she is such a pig.. always overslept de.. haha.. so i went to biz library there study before meeting her at mrt station... anyway thx for ur breakfast..!

1st paper MCOM.. it was alright though.. second paper MPRG.. this paper is a killer! the programming part is so hard! guess i didn't study well.. =(

today so nan de hl would company me home sia.. actually not home.. to my hse there de mrt only.. haha.. cos she got some free time before she go and meet the person who can help her buy her lappy..




woohoo! last paper! MCOT..

today some minor things happened.. was supposed to meet hl around 10 to study at jp.. i morning call her from 8 - 930.. she nv pick up till 930.. i tot something happened to her.. yuan lai.. she is still sleeping.. she is such a pig.. =p

okay after meeting her liao went jp.. decided to go the library there study.. guess what.. i never seen such a library that has NO TABLES.. only chairs and sofas.. omg! for the entire day we sat at the sofa.. my back and neck is damm pain.. this library is so crappy.. btw sry to hl for introducing u to come and study at this lousy library..

i foresee that this paper is gonna be easy.. yesh it is! but got 2 ques i din managed to study that part.. =( hope it wun affect much..


*we gonna meet tonight under the moonlight.